Botober 6: Tortoise Champion

[alfvaen]

This one ended up a little bit more contrived, and I'm not sure if I'm quite happy with it, but I'm tired of it so here's what you get based on the day's prompts:

• Things: Poopamancerarghfart
• Concepts: Fierce Tortoise Champion
• Advanced: Terror of hollow wood, especially that part behind the knees where spiders are most likely to be
• Terrible: A shred of rusted tin

Tortoise Champion

Once long ago there was a Fierce Tortoise Champion. His name was too atrocious to be repeated, so I will call him P--t. He had been cursed with this name by an Mean Polecat Wizard and was on a quest to undo the curse. His only weapon was a Shred of Rusted Tin which he had found near a Shack by the Side of the Road, where it had clearly Fallen from the Roof.

First he passed over a Quite Rocky Beach. While he was walking along the edge of the water he spotted a Spiny Lobster who was in a Predicament, having been caught by the shell of a Giant Clam. P--t used his Shred of Rusted Tin to reflect sunlight onto the Giant Clam until the mollusk relented and released the crustacean. The Spiny Lobster was so grateful for the rescue that she gave him an Earlobe Scraper and promised to come to his aid if he rubbed on it.

Our Fierce Tortoise Champion continued on past the beach and into a Great City under a Lowering Grey Cloud. There he encountered a Tiny Green Poodle who looked quite worried; when P--t asked her, she said she had lost her Master and Companion and did not know where he might be found, and the Motor Traffic nearby was quite Frightening. P--t led her to the Crosswalk and across the street to a nearby park, where they found a Distraught Human bearing a long leash. The Human was excited to see the Tiny Poodle and, in gratitude, gave P--t a Dog Whistle to summon them if he needed their help.

Outside, the city, P--t encountered a Flying Saucer which was Lodged into the Side of a Hill. The Alien Being inside was quite grateful for P--t's help in extricating its Saucer from the Hill, and in gratitude gave him a Radio Transmitter in case he required any assistance in future.

Then P--t was obliged to cross a Wide River, full of Alligators and Razorbacks. Unlike some of his Turtle Friends, P--t was unable to swim. So he used the Earlobe Scraper and rasped it with a stick until his friend the Spiny Lobster arrived and carried him across the River.

The path next led through a Spooky Forest, and past a Hollow Log. P--t was quite terrified of the Spiders that are known to lurk inside Hollow Logs, jumping out to attack the Backs of the Knees of Passersby. In desperation, he used his Dog Whistle, and the Tiny Green Poodle and her Human soon arrived. The Tiny Green Poodle had legs that were too short for the Spiders to attack, and she drove them out of the log with her Fierce Barking, leaving the way clear for our Fierce Tortoise Champion to proceed.

Finally, P--t found himself confronted with an Extremely Hot River of Lava, which he could not even get near. Thinking quickly, he used his Radio Transmitted to summon his friend the Alien Being, who used his Astro Projector to teleport P--t to the far side of the River of Lava. He thanked the Alien Being for its assistance and continued to its final destination.

The Mean Polecat Wizard was curled up in his burrow and was quite surprised to see P--t there. P--t brandished his Shred of Rusted Tin and demanded that the Mean Polecat Wizard restore his name. The Mean Polecat Wizard was only too happy to do so, because the name he had cursed the Fierce Tortoise Champion with was, by accident, his own name, which was a distinguished Polecat name, and he was happy to return the Tortoise Champion his own name of Carapactacus. They parted friends and Carapactacus set out to restore the reputation of the Unjustly Maligned Polecat Wizard in future.